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Alright so there are about 24 days left until my belly dancing performance so I need to get rid of some weight before then. And this time I really feel like I can do it without too much going wrong because in all reality I'm the only thing standing in the way of my goal weight. Nothing else.

Feeling really positive about this :D
I have had about 800 - 900 calories today. It's horrible because a lot of that was pasta (my #1 weakness) and I feel absolutely disgusting.
I really need to get my head on straight because I have my first belly dance performance at the end of the month and there is no way I'm going on stage looking the way I do now.

So it's time for me to get into an extreme weight loss mode and lose as much as I can before our performance.

Wish me luck?
Feeling like utter crap. Fasting today and hopefully tomorrow (although it will be hard because I have work...)

Everything is insane lately. I need a vacation.
I actually have gained five pounds. Five pounds that I worked so hard to get off.
What the hell is wrong with me?

I'm fasting until this ugly weight is gone and I'm at least back to where I was.
I like starting over on Mondays and I'm feeling optimistic about how things may turn out. I was up way late last night trying to finish a paper for my naval history course so I've decided to quit life for today and just relax.
And by relax I mean exercise because I probably won't get to do it tomorrow because I have class then work.

Feb. 16th, 2009

I tend to do a lot of stress eating.
School stresses me out.
My family stresses me out.
Not having enough money to pay off my credit card stresses me out.
Not getting choreography right in dance class stresses me out.
Trying to lose weight and failing stresses me out.

I'm beginning to see a very unhealthy pattern here.

I'm restricting again starting tomorrow, concentrating mostly on fruit and veg. Absolutely no meat or pasta. I also need to find some relaxing music to try and help me calm the hell down. Maybe I won't stress eat so much this week.

Wish me luck?
I had a pretty close call about an hour ago when my mom offered me a piece of pound cake that she had made. I took a small bite before I came to my senses and threw the piece out (not when my mom was looking obviously).
Other than that everything is going pretty well so far. I think I can keep it up :D

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Why am I creeping around LiveJournal instead of studying for my mid-terms on Monday? (It's because I have the attention span of a teaspoon and would rather do anything but study)

I think I've found a way of eating a low-calorie lunch without having people harass me about not eating enough for my meal- not that it should be their business anyway. Egg sandwiches made with hard-boiled eggs (no yolk), reduced calorie whipped dressing, and reduced calorie bread.
Whatever shuts people up.

I really should go and study some naval history...why I decided that boats were cool, I'll never know. But I love the professor!

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There are a few personal rules that I should have set for myself at the beginning of the New Year, but for some lame reason I didn't. I cannot, under any circumstances, have any more pasta or rice no matter how "healthy" the box says it is. Starchy stuff like that is my big weakness and when I binge it's usually on those kinds of foods...so it's time to stop.
My best friend persuaded me to come out to dinner with her and some people that I haven't seen in a really long time and I didn't want to draw any attention to myself by not eating anything. However the only vegetarian option on the menu was fettuccini alfredo and even though I didn't eat all of it I feel so gross.

So no more pasta or rice. It's just not worth the anxiety anymore.
So far today is going pretty well! I'm feeling really positive even though I'm stressed out from all the school work that I have to do this week.
I'm really hoping that this good mood keeps up.
I have my zills class tonight and I'm so excited! >.<

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